Self-awareness can help you fix a family problem because, when you understand how everyone’s emotions, thoughts, and actions, affect each other, then you’re able to work on solutions to even the most difficult situations.
For much of history we have viewed the family as a unit that helped us
with survival. We depended on each other because there was strength and
security in numbers. Recent developments in society and technology have
allowed us to experience the family differently than we used to. We now
are able to work on making our families as healthy as possible—a
concept that our ancestors never even contemplated.
With this new ability to improve the health of our families comes a great
opportunity to enjoy our family relationships like never before. We
also get to face challenges in new ways. In the past we let conflict
fester and continue throughout our lives. We didn’t have the tools to
actually fix things. Now we do and consulting gives families some tools
they can use to increase the happiness in their homes.
Some basic things you can think about when a family problem arises include:
- What is the problem really about?
- Do you know what each family member thinks about the problem?
- Have you all worked together to come up with possible solutions?
- Is everyone’s voice listened to and given equal weight?
- Does everyone know how to listen to other points of view?
- Can people deal with conflict without escalating?
- Is conflict an opportunity for change in your family?
- How are your communication skills?
- Do you have a consistent system for resolving problems in the family?
- Do you ask for neutral help or advice from uninvolved third parties?
Resolving problems in the family has a lot to do with the skills and experiences we bring to the table. A lot of us repeat the patterns we saw at home but we now have the benefit of new strategies to actually resolve
problems rather than perpetuating them. Consider some of the following
ideas to help your family increase self-awareness and move forward positively:
- Develop a conflict resolution strategy.
- Develop communication skills.
- Develop listening skills.
- Work together.
It’s amazing how those four basic elements can help families resolve
problems. Most of our families are not set up to fix problems, just
make them go away temporarily. I enjoy consulting for parents to create
new ways of actually fixing problems in the family, so everyone involved can feel included and valued.
What will you do to develop self-awareness and fix the problems in your family?
Cheers,
Guy