The Self-Awareness Guy

Lack of Self-Awareness Is the Root of All Problems in the World - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Lack of Self-Awareness Is the Root of All Problems in the World

The root of all the problems in the world is people’s inability to deal with emotions. Individuals who have self-awareness are able to identify what they’re feeling, the emotion that drives it, and channel their actions in a positive direction, people who aren’t comfortable dealing with emotions often do things like:

  • Hurt themselves or others.
  • Lash out in anger.
  • Go numb because they don’t want to feel anything.
  • Watch as horrible things happen to others.
  • Seek revenge or retribution.
  • Wish awful things to happen to others.
  • Create roadblocks and make life difficult for others.
  • Become withdrawn or depressed.
  • Sabotage themselves or others.
  • Turn to drugs and alcohol to escape what they’re feeling.
  • Be aggressive toward others to protect their soft insides.
  • Refuse to connect meaningfully with others because it might expose them to feeling something.
  • Accept negative relationships as normal.
  • Accept violence and chaos as normal.
  • Live in fear.

It’s not that people want to do these things, it’s just that their families, friends, societies, and they themselves have grown to believe that this is the only available option. What they may not realize is that they don’t have to live this way, they can actually build self-awareness, get in touch with their emotions, and do things like:

  • Treat themselves and others well.
  • Focus on being joyful.
  • Actively work on experiencing what’s going on inside them.
  • Help other people.
  • Forgive.
  • Wish for good things to happen to others.
  • Make life easier for others.
  • Step out of their shell.
  • Do things to help themselves and others succeed.
  • Experience what’s inside themselves and seek counseling for anything that’s leading them in a negative direction.
  • Be caring toward others.
  • Let people into their lives and show their real selves.
  • Strive to build positive relationships.
  • See kindness and peace as normal.
  • Live with courage.

For every negative approach to dealing with emotions there is a positive counterpart. The key to creating a better world is for people to have the self-awareness to realize when they’re feeling something, identify the emotion beneath it, and deal with it in a positive way. As human beings, we’ve become very skilled at coping with emotions (and the way they make us feel) in profoundly negative ways. The irony is that we can move in a positive direction any time we choose and build a world that benefits everyone.

By the way, if you’re thinking that this type of approach is unrealistic or impossible, you’re behaving like the people in the first list. In order to create a more emotionally healthy world, it’s important to first acknowledge that something is askew and then take conscious steps to move down a different path.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and deal positively with your emotions?

Cheers,

Guy

How to Be Happy? Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

How to Be Happy? Self-Awareness

My clients frequently ask me how to be happy. Over the years I’ve noticed that a common characteristic of people who are happy is having a strong awareness of who we are and where we are going. Self-awareness is a deep understanding of who we are. It literally impacts how we treat ourselves and others and what kind of life we live. Let me give you a real world example to illustrate how important it is to get to know yourself.

Person A says he is a happy go lucky person that always is having a great time. He has a lot of friends and says he’s confident and an optimist. He lives a life that looks great to everyone on the outside but, when he has to think about it, Person A is deeply unhappy. He has unresolved issues in his life that are so difficult that he refuses to look at them. So person A appears happy on the outside but inside he is constantly struggling to ignore and cast aside the demons he carries. This type of person is not living a life of self-awareness because he won’t even begin the process of understanding who he is in order to move forward. He chooses instead to live a live of superficial happiness based on appearances.

Person B, on the other hand, also has issues that hurt him deeply and made him unhappy. He also appears happy to the outside world but his happiness comes from a very different place. Person B decided years ago to look at the things that brought him pain. He worked very hard to acknowledge his past and create a plan to move beyond the hurt. When person B is alone he feels genuinely happy because he has actually moved past the challenges in his past. This type of happiness is far more genuine because the person has literally worked through the things that made them unhappy. His happiness is real because it’s based on his deep self-awareness based on facing his hurts.

Genuine happiness comes from deep inside us. It is a level of existence that we achieve only when we work through the challenges from our past. I’m not suggesting that we live in the past but rather that we acknowledge the things that hurt us earlier in life and then develop a plan to move forward. People get caught up in the idea that they have to live in pain if they look at the difficult issues in their life when it really provides an opportunity to go beyond those issues and grow in positive ways. Imagine your life without those nagging things that hold you back. Think about how successful you would be if you didn’t have those voices trying to keep you from succeeding.

Everyone deserves to live a happy life, one where we’re genuinely fulfilled and content. Those who are truly happy have left the burdens of the past behind. Think about it as the difference between living your life with the burden of carrying a giant monkey on your back and never getting rid of it versus letting it go and living a much lighter and energized existence. You will truly enjoy living from a place of authentic happiness free from the worries of the past. It is achievable for everyone but it takes conscious effort and work. Once you do the work the rewards are amazing.

Self-awareness is not about being selfish or self-indulgent, it’s about understanding who you are and constantly working on becoming the best person you can be. You get to be the best you possible and you get to live a life of fulfillment rather than just getting by. Those who choose to be aware of whom they really are enjoy the benefits of living a genuinely happy life.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and be happy?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Trusting Your Inner Voice - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Trusting Your Inner Voice

Nothing is a beautiful as the voice inside you. Pay attention to it and you’ll live a life of great self-awareness, success and happiness. Ignore it and you’ll move in a very different direction. Your inner voice is that part of you that tells you what you really want to do in life and who you are deep inside.

Self-awareness means paying attention to your inner voice as it guides you toward living authentically and making your dreams come true. Here are some questions you can ask yourself to begin discovering your true path:

  1. If I could choose any career in life what would it be?
  2. What is the talent I possess that I could use to bring joy into my life?
  3. What message(s) is my inner voice sending me?
  4. How would my life be different if I listened to my inner voice?
  5. What will I commit to doing today to achieve what my inner voice tells me to?

As you answer these questions you’ll begin thinking more deeply about the things you find meaningful and fulfilling. Imagine living your life based on what you want to do rather than settling for whatever comes your way or what other people tell you to do. What will you do to listen to your inner voice?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Moving Your Life in the Direction You Choose - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Moving Your Life in the Direction You Choose

A big part of self-awareness is knowing yourself well enough to consciously move your life in any direction you choose. The way you behave each day predicts the results you will get, whether you succeed or stagnate. Here are some practical things you can do to start your journey:

1. Focus on the thing you want to happen, this is your goal.
2. Determine three actions you can take to achieve that specific goal.
3. Pick one action and start following through on it today.
4. When you’ve achieved one goal, move on to the next.
5. Take time to celebrate yourself and your accomplishment.

The purposeful act of following through and taking action trains your mind to take on challenges. When you achieve a goal it gives you strength and courage to keep moving forward in life, you begin to see the power you have over your circumstances, and it also increases your self-awareness.

The key to success in life is going from the thinking phase to the doing part. Try working through the five steps we’ve outlined and keep doing it until you succeed. Along the way you will be practicing the skills necessary to move your life in any direction you choose.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and move your life forward positively?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware People Realize Things Can't Make Them Happy - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware People Realize Things Can’t Make Them Happy

I frequently consult with people who lack self-awareness and genuinely believe that buying things will make them happy. Time after time they realize that buying stuff really doesn’t affect their long term happiness. Sure, there is a buzz that comes from buying something you like but it doesn’t resolve the underlying things that are vital to fulfillment. This doesn’t mean that you can’t be happy buying things, it just requires that you put some thought into why you buy stuff. If you buy objects with the hopes of feeling better about yourself, I have some basic questions you can ask yourself to build self-awareness and help you focus on what’s really going on.

1. Do I really need this object?
2. How am I focusing on fixing the deeper issues in my life?
3. Do I feel less whole when I can’t shop?
4. In what ways does buying things affect my emotions?
5. Does shopping help me postpone feeling emotions?
6. Do I hide the fact that I buy stuff from others?
7. Do I have to buy other stuff to keep the buzz going?
8. In what other areas of my life could I devote more energy and thought?
9. Could my money be used for long-term success?
10. How am I defined by my things?

The answers to these questions will help you get some perspective on how your buying habits affect your life. There’s nothing wrong or horrible with buying nice things unless it prevents you from looking at the deeper stuff in life.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and be happy from sources other than buying things?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Helps You Do What You Love in Life - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Helps You Do What You Love in Life

Self-awareness helps you do what you love in life because, when you comprehend why you feel, think, and behave the way you do, you’re able to identify a meaningful path and live authentically.

It’s really normal to want to figure out what you really want to do in life. It’s much more fulfilling to do things you love than things you have to do. Much of the discomfort you feel comes from not following your true path.

When I consult with people, we frequently talk about how they can tell if they are following their path. The answer varies from person to person but I’ve found that people just feel better, happier, stronger, more motivated and productive when they build self-awareness and do things they love. It’s the feeling you get when you’re doing things you actually enjoy doing rather than things that bring you discomfort. Think of the millions of people toiling in jobs they hate because they haven’t yet connected with what they really want to do. What would their lives look like if they incorporated more of the activities that bring them joy?

Think about the following questions in order to figure out what you want to do with your life:

  1. What do I love doing more than anything?
  2. Am I doing that thing?
  3. What am I doing to pursue my dreams in general?
  4. Am I settling for a life that does not include my dreams?
  5. What am I afraid of?
  6. What specific action can I take today to move toward my dreams?

You deserve to live a great life and you have the power to move toward your goals and dreams at any moment you choose to. Doing what you love isn’t automatic, it requires conscious thought and persistence. The good news is that you can do concrete things to move in any direction you want. Start today and you could be on your way to doing the things you’ve always dreamed of.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and do what you love in life?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Being Unhelpful - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Being Unhelpful

The more self-awareness you have, the happier you are and the more you move away from being unhelpful when others need assistance. There are many instances where people don’t help each other very much or choose to interact negatively, for example:

  • Pointing out what’s going wrong instead of what is going well.
  • Criticizing instead of offering solutions.
  • Talking over people.
  • Making sarcastic or sardonic remarks.
  • Taking a lot of time to explain why they can’t do something rather than doing it.
  • Finding ways to not help.
  • Acting like a know-it-all and making people feel inadequate.

As you gain more self-awareness you move away from these types of behaviors because you realize that other people are valuable, and you do things like:

  • Highlight what is going well.
  • Offer solutions.
  • Listen.
  • Make positive remarks.
  • Do something helpful instead of talking about what you can’t do.
  • Find ways to help.
  • Behave in ways that are kind and helpful.

There is a vast difference between the first list and the second list; one hurts people and creates conflict and the other encourages relationship building. You get to choose which path you take. Self-awareness means you understand how important it is to treat everyone with respect and care. What will you do to be more helpful?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy