The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-Awareness and Your Worldview - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Your Worldview

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Your level of self-awareness deeply affects your worldview. If you believe that the world is an unforgiving place where people can’t be trusted or want to harm you then you’ll live your life in a particular way. If, on the other hand, you see the world as a place where people can be trusted and are generally well-meaning you’ll behave in other ways. Your worldview colors everything you do in life and will lead you down a certain path which can be beneficial or full of hindrances.

In order to increase your self-awareness and enjoy life, take some time to ask yourself where your assumptions about the world come from. Identify the beliefs you hold that keep you from living happily and take action to shift them in a more positive direction. For example: If you believe that you can’t talk with someone, consciously decide that you’ll give them the benefit of the doubt and communicate with them in a way that invites them to connect with you. It takes deliberate effort and courage to shift your worldview but it can help you live much more meaningfully. What will you do to create a positive worldview?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware People Are Compassionate - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware People Are Compassionate

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When you practice compassion as part of your  self-awareness journey you’ll find that you’re able to care for yourself and others. Compassion is the ability to put yourself in someone else’s shoes and treat them with care and kindness. In doing so you create positive energy in your life and in the world as well.

Compassionate human beings understand that they are not the only people in the world, that other individuals and groups have a different and valid experience. When you practice compassion, you are able to put your own experience and needs aside, really empathize with someone else, and recognize when they need help.

As you build your self-awareness, you will find that you become more comfortable and better able to manage your own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, which will enable you to connect with others on a more meaningful level. The healthier you are, the more you are in a position to help others.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and practice compassion?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware People Do More Than Fixing Problems - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware People Do More Than Fixing Problems

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I have facilitated numerous workshops and consulted with myriad people who lack self-awareness and a common theme that comes up is the idea of fixing things. From an early age, we are taught to confront any problem with a fix. If someone says something to us in our personal or professional life we immediately jump and look for ways to fix it. While I like resolving issues, it’s also important to give some importance to just building self-awareness and working on things without fixing them. Next time someone comes to you with a problem, consider the following possibilities:

1. Listen without interrupting or offering advice.
2. Give yourself permission not to fix anything.
3. Let the person talk to you freely and give them the time to do so.
4. Even if you disagree, don’t rebut or become defensive.
5. Learn to recognize the things that trigger your defensiveness or anger.
6. Offer to listen to the person again.
7. Always remain calm and caring.

The act of listening changes the whole dynamic in relationships. Suddenly we can learn what other people really think and simply bond with them. This approach is different because it requires that, instead of talking or jumping in, we just let someone else tell us about the things they find meaningful. This approach greatly reduces hurt feelings and anger because it requires us to react calmly to anything another person says.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and stop fixing things?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware Leaders Listen to Their Employees - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware Leaders Listen to Their Employees

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There is frequently a large gap between how leaders think they are perceived and what’s really going on. I enjoy talking with employees about how their bosses function because that’s where the juicy stuff is. Employees have valuable insights on the strengths and areas for improvement of their supervisors and it can be very helpful to listen to their advice.

The opportunity that many leaders miss out on is using their employees’ ideas to improve their leadership abilities or  how their workplaces function. This often happens because leaders simply don’t have open, two-way communication with their employees. When they open up the lines of communication they have access to the rich information and knowledge their employees possess. This, in turn, helps leaders understand where they stand with their employees and what adjustments might be beneficial. Ask yourself the following questions to asses the quality of your communication with your  employees.

1.  What percentage of time do you listen to your employees with no interruptions?

2.  What is the last great idea you got by listening to an employee?

3.  How is conflict dealt with in your organization? What part does effective  communication play?

4.  What would your employees say about the morale and motivation in your organization?

5.  What advice would your employees give you about how to improve your organization?

6.  In what ways do your employees demonstrate they are comfortable talking with you?

7.  What do your employees say about you?

If you know the answers to these questions then you’re likely practicing effective communication with your employees. Chances are that you also know what they are saying about you. If you don’t have answers to these questions you can always make some adjustments to make sure you are connected to your employees.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and communicate more openly with your employees?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Improves Your Dating Life - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Improves Your Dating Life

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People who lack self-awareness tend to have a lot of dating problems because they don’t know who they are or what they really want. My lovely clients tell me all kinds of stories about the bad boys and girls they date or the fact that they can’t find Mr. or Ms. Right. What I’ve found out over the years is that people date haphazardly. They have some vague notion of what they want but they are missing a few key elements that will help them date at a deeper, more rewarding level. Next time you are feeling troubled by your dating life think of the following ideas.

1. Am I happy with myself or am I looking for someone to fill that void?
2. Am I doing what I want with my life?
3. Do I date negative people because, deep down, I don’t like myself?
4. Do I know how to meet positive, supportive people to date?
5. Am I meeting people that make me feel good about myself?
6. Do I have the communication and interpersonal skills to date well?
7. Why do I date?

As you think of answers to these questions you will begin to understand yourself more and identify the patterns that have led you to relationship problems. If you keep repeating the same behaviors you will likely get the same results. It’s only when we begin to understand ourselves and treat ourselves well that we can begin letting great people into our lives.

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware People Work on Healing Their Hurts - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware People Work on Healing Their Hurts

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When you don’t heal your psychological hurts you live a life avoiding, accommodating, and tiptoeing around how you feel inside while never getting to the core of what’s really going on or developing self-awareness.

Unfortunately, people’s pain doesn’t only affect them, it spreads to others and creates all kinds of undesirable situations at home or at work. When people don’t heal their own hurts, they create discomfort in living rooms and board rooms and the consequences include:

  • Toxic families.
  • Broken marriages.
  • Damaged kids.
  • People who don’t like themselves or others.
  • Chronic conflict.
  • Unresolved issues.
  • Workplaces where people treat each other horribly.
  • Gossip.
  • Organizations that promote negative behaviors.
  • Ongoing retribution.
  • Punitive, controlling or capricious leadership.
  • Hurting others to cover for your hurts.
  • Insecurity and ego.
  • Lack of empathy.

Do any of these sound familiar? They happen all the time but, fortunately, you can interrupt these types of situations by increasing your self-awareness: Understand why you do things and how to move in a more positive direction.

The process of healing your hurts isn’t easy but it dramatically increases your quality of life and, by extension, the lives of everyone around you as well as well-being of the world. The way to get started is to acknowledge you have a hurt and then tend to it consciously and deliberately until it goes away.

What will you do to build self-awareness and start healing your hurts?

Cheers,

Guy

10 Behaviors of Someone with Strong Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

10 Behaviors of Someone with Strong Self-Awareness

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Here are ten behaviors of someone with strong self-awareness:

  • They do things consciously rather than just reacting to stuff.
  • They are in touch with their emotions and are comfortable feeling them.
  • They are comfortable with other people’s emotions.
  • They treat other people with kindness, empathy, and compassion.
  • They actively work on healing their past hurts.
  • They understand that there are other people in the world besides them.
  • They get along with others and enjoy positive relationships.
  • They know who they really are deep inside and live life accordingly.
  • They’re flexible and open to change.
  • They’re always growing.

People who possess self-awareness are able to expertly manage their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors so they can live happy, fulfilling lives. If you are self-aware, you know yourself deeply and live based on the real you. This authentic existence allows you to move past all the petty stuff and focus on enjoying your time on this planet and encouraging others to do the same.

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy