The Self-Awareness Guy

This two-part series on self-awareness and deeper communication skills is designed to help you build a workplace environment where people interact positively and get more done with less effort.

Many workplace conflicts arise because of disparate values, goals, objectives, strategies, levels of self-awareness, and points of view. Well-meaning, intelligent leaders and employees can genuinely want to get along but not know how to communicate meaningfully and productively. When I consult with groups in active conflict, I often help the participants learn and practice skills to help them connect on a deeper level, interact positively and generate positive results in the workplace.

We sometimes forget to build relationships before jumping into problem-solving and we don’t consistently create environments where people are encouraged to be self-aware and work together to find solutions. The most common communication model is people talking at each other instead of with each other. I’ve found that individuals have an amazing capability to work collaboratively when they take the time to build a strong foundation first. Here is a practical approach to help you create a workplace environment where people are self-aware and reach mutually beneficial solutions. This process works best with groups of twenty people or less.

1. Agree on a place and time to meet. Make it comfortable, interruption-free and conducive to conversation.
2. Have a skilled, welcoming, neutral facilitator run the meeting.
3. Have the facilitator welcome everyone and present the ground rules: One person talks at a time and, when that person is talking, everyone listens. All opinions and ideas are valid.
4. Have the facilitator pick a single topic of interest.
5. Have each person in the room talk about his or her perspective on the topic for up to two minutes. Encourage people to talk from the heart and not from the head. Also mention that they don’t have to talk about anything they don’t feel comfortable sharing.
6. Ask the group to listen to the person speaking without interruptions, comments, editorializing, rebuttals, reactions or any other kind of distraction. Ask people to simply listen and remind them that everyone else will do the same for them when it’s their turn.
7. When everyone is done speaking ask the participants to share their impressions of what just happened. Go around the room and allow each person up to a minute to share.
8. Take a break.
9. Have the neutral facilitator pick another topic of interest.
   Repeat the process three times.

Once you’ve repeated this process three times the group will be ready to move on to the next phase which is working together. Stay tuned for part two of this series where we’ll talk about how to help people collaborate to solve problems.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and practice deeper communication skills in your workplace?

Cheers,

Guy

Leaders who lack self-awareness don’t succeed at team building because they don’t know how to manage their own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, let alone think about how to help others do it.

I get a lot of questions about team building revolving around how to bring people together, help employees work well in groups or encourage people to get along. The focus always seems to be on a group of people rather than individuals. Over many years of helping people build dynamic, productive teams I’ve found that an excellent place to start is with the I. Nothing happens without I and here are five reasons why.

You Don’t Believe Team Building Works

If you’re not into team building then no amount of cajoling or persuading is going to convince you that team building can help you build a more positive workplace. You’ll likely not participate fully or buy into team building activities or creating a workplace philosophy that encourages it.

You Believe that People are Solely Individual Achievers

This mindset creates motivated individuals who act alone as free agents rather than contributing to the well-being of the group. This includes instances of the “star salesman” or “go-to guy” who are enshrined because they do such a great individual job. What happens when we idolize individuals is that we create a culture where one person is more important than the other. Great teams are about people being equally valuable and important.

You Can’t Yet See the Long-Term Benefits of Team Building

Perhaps you’ve never worked in an organization where people worked together and got more done with less effort. Maybe all you’ve seen is people backstabbing and competing with each other so you’ve surmised that it has to be that way. Team building is part of a long-term strategy that helps you and your employees build a workplace where people are able to problem-solve and support each other.

You Think Other People Build Teams, Not You

Team building is fine to get the rabble working together but you’re above the fray. This leads in almost every instance to you not being part of the team. This perspective overlooks that you can actually benefit from actively participating and being part of a team.

You Try to Avoid Conflict

It’s hard to navigate the challenges or conflicts that arise when people work together. Most people stay stuck “agreeing to disagree” instead of learning skills to actually work together and build strong teams. It’s the act of working together to resolve conflicts that builds more effective workplaces.

The thread that runs through all these examples is that they all begin with you. You decide whether you create the conditions necessary to promote excellent team building in your workplace. You choose whether it’s a priority or a band aid when you’ve already reached meltdown.

The key to successful team building is to practice and promote the skills that will help you and your people work well together. What will you do to develop self-awareness and promote successful team building in your workplace?

Cheers,

Guy