The Self-Awareness Guy, Author at The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-Awareness and Being Damaged

January 23, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-awareness is a quality that is in short supply in deeply damaged people because they tend to behave unconsciously, based on their inner pain. When someone is hurt at a core level and lashes out based on those inner wounds, it’s a visceral reaction rather than one based on careful deliberation. Here are some characteristics of a deeply damaged person:

Thinking, feeling and behaving negatively based on past hurts.
Lack of empathy toward others.
Rigid thinking and inability to consider other points of view.
Inability to heal.
Reluctance to change, stuck in current way of doing things.
Lashing out at others based on unresolved issues inside himself.
Unwilling to examine what causes his inner turmoil.
Lack of understanding of what will really make him happy.
Seeks approval from people who don’t really value him.
Pattern of negative relationships.
Harsh, hard, commanding personality on the outside, fragile on the inside.
Lies to self and others to justify incongruous, inconsistent thoughts and beliefs.
Treats other people poorly, a reflection of his inner feelings about himself.

If you’ve ever met a person like this, you’ve probably gotten a creepy feeling about them, unless you fall into this category, in which case the behavior seems normal. Thankfully, even deeply troubled people can change the course of their lives by replacing their old thoughts and behaviors with more positive ones. It’s a long and arduous process, but anyone with the will to let go of the damage and love themselves is capable of doing it.

The key to being genuinely happy in life is to think and behave positively to make the world a better place for yourself and others. Self-awareness allows you to take a careful, meaningful look at yourself and heal the hurts that keep you from being your true, shiny self. What will you do to move beyond the damage?

Cheers,

Guy

self-awareness consulting

Self-Awareness and Finding Your Path as a Leader

January 22, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-awareness helps you find your path as a leader because, when you understand who you are and what you really want in life, you are able to identify things that bring you joy at work instead of misery.

Many leaders experience discomfort at work because they are not doing the things they love. This feeling manifests itself in many ways including unhappiness, lack of motivation and loss of focus. The great thing about work is that you can move in any direction you want at any time. Here’s a couple ideas to help you begin your journey.

Define Your Path

How will you know where you want to go if you haven’t defined it yet? Take some time to increase your self-awareness and figure out who you are and what really brings you joy at work. Focus on ways to reach for your dreams. The idea is to work in an environment that reflects what you really love to do and becomes your path. The more you connect with yourself the clearer your path will look.

Listen to Your Inner Voice

We spend so much time listening to what other people think we should do that we frequently ignore the most important voice, our own. Once you focus on developing your self-awareness and connecting with your dreams at work, the voice inside you will let you know if you’re on course or veering in some other direction. Your inner voice gives you clues and insight and tells you when you’re on the path. Learn to listen to it and pay attention to what it says.

Take Action

Once you’re on your path, doors will open for you that you didn’t know existed before. Make sure to take advantage of opportunities that come your way and that fit with your true goals and dreams. Focus on small actions that build your self-awareness and confidence, and always keep in mind that staying on your path means staying true to yourself.

Following your path is a matter of building self-awareness by getting in touch with who you really are and building a career based on that idea. Remember to take it easy on yourself; it’s OK to go off the path occasionally as long as you’re living the majority of your life on or near it. What will you do to increase self-awareness and be more fulfilled at work?

Cheers,

Guy

Unhappy People Lack Self-Awareness

January 22, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Years ago, I had to interact with this unhappy person who was always stomping around in a state of heightened agitation and unease. I remember feeling drained and annoyed by what seemed to be a person who lacked self-awareness, was always in his own little world, and didn’t seem to care about anyone else but himself. I always wanted to tell him that there was so much more to life than being miserable and upset all the time, or that he didn’t have to get his stuff on others.

Then I realized that I was the unhappy person. Regardless of how he was behaving, it was I who was becoming upset about the things he was doing. For many years after this realization, I worked hard on calming and healing myself instead of focusing on others. Where once I would get perturbed by someone like him, I eventually learned to handle it.

The moral of the story is that we have within us the power to react any way we want to any person or event in our lives. Self-awareness means possessing the balance within you to find calm in the heaviest storm. What will you do about the unhappy person in your life?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware Leaders Value Diversity

January 22, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-aware leaders and organizations are aware of the benefits of a diversity in the workplace. Diversity is not just a buzzword that creates extra work for human resources departments, it is a tangible asset that can be used to benefit the organization. First a brief definition of diversity. I have worked with many companies to help them overcome the challenges diversity presents and each company defines diversity differently. I don’t believe in complicating things so I propose the following definition:

Workplace Diversity

The issues related to developing a workplace that is uniformly inclusive and encourages meaningful participation from all individuals in the organization regardless of background.

This brief definition gets rid of a lot of the extraneous noise related to diversity. We tend to ask too many questions and stumble around issues like race, age, gender, disability and culture when all we really want to do is help our employees get along.

Proactive human resources departments understand the benefits of designing policies that draw from the talent pool and encourage productivity and innovation. Why would any company limit the potential of the employees unless it expressly wanted to limit its own success?

If you are in human resources or are a leader/manager looking for ideas to increase inclusiveness then you might consider the following diversity-boosting ideas.

1. Hire based on qualifications required for a specific job.

2. Strive to create as varied a mix of people in your workplace as possible.

3. Ask your managers to actively identify people’s talents and use them.

4. Encourage people to leave their preconceptions at the door.

5. Create opportunities for the growth and success of all your employees.

6. Set up an ongoing training program that helps individuals discuss diversity.

7. Create a comprehensive written strategy for increasing diversity in your workplace.

8. Practice these approaches over time.

Diversity is not a mystery and is easily incorporated into the culture of any organization. It requires self-awareness, buy-in, and commitment starting at the top. The rewards are impressive. Many companies report increased innovation, productivity, morale and team effectiveness when they implement a thoughtful plan to boost diversity.

Diversity is not a destabilizing force, it is an opportunity to harness the power of the many amazing talents of your workforce. Those who understand this potential succeed at high levels. What will you do to develop self-awareness and use diversity to help your organization thrive?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Leads to Real Happiness

January 21, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

A lot of people claim they’re happy and then think, say, and do things that indicate they’re not. The thing I like so much about self-awareness is that it’s an actual path to happiness, not just some false assertion. Here’s how it works:

You take an ongoing, honest, candid look at yourself, examining your strengths and areas for improvement.
You identify the parts of your life that don’t lead to joy, these are often the remnants of your formative years when you were hurt in some way.
You feel all the emotions related to your past hurts and actively work on healing them. You go to therapy if necessary.
You begin forming a clear picture of your whole self.
What you feel, think, say, and do all follow the same path and don’t conflict with each other.
You identify who you genuinely are deep inside and what you really want to do with your life.
You take action every day to live life as the real you.
Your level of kindness and compassion toward yourself and others keeps growing.
You feel, think, and behave positively toward yourself and others; not just say you do.
You become so happy inside that you make the world a better place for everyone.

If you value self-awareness, you’re likely doing one or several of these things right now and you’re on your way to living a peaceful, loving, balanced, dynamic, fulfilling, healthy life. What does real happiness mean to you?

Cheers,
Guy

Live the One Life You Have with Self-Awareness

January 21, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

I always encourage people to live the one life they have with self-awareness because it will help them navigate all the challenges they will face. Once you understand your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, you’ll be able to live a deeply fulfilling, meaningful existence.

Perspective frequently makes the difference in the choices you make in life. If you feel a sense of urgency, you are more likely to try to accomplish a task. People motivate themselves in different ways but a key characteristic of those who create movement is a sense that they have to get it done.

You only have one life to live so you might as well make the most of it. Why then is it that people spend incredible amounts of time and effort on everything but what is truly meaningful to them? It’s almost as if someone told them along the way that they couldn’t accomplish what they wanted in life. So they settle for what comes their way, focusing on subsistence rather than growth.

A positive way to improve self-awareness and begin redirecting your thoughts is to ask yourself, “If I only had one week to live, what would I want to do?”

Life is a precious and finite gift. Why would anyone choose to live it without doing something they really love? Think about your own situation and think about what you really want to do in life. Then put some thought into increasing self-awareness and what you can actually do to incorporate your dreams into your everyday life. As you begin working on your dreams, you will begin feeling happier and more balanced because you are connecting with who you really are. Life is just funner when you’re doing stuff you like.

Build in some urgency starting today. What will you do to improve your self-awareness and live the life you really want to?

Cheers,

Guy

Leadership, Self-Awareness, and Improving Morale in Your Company

January 21, 2023 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Leaders who possess self-awareness are able to improve morale in their companies because they understand how their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors affect them and others.

I consult with leaders and organizations to help them improve morale by focusing on positive behaviors. It’s very normal for companies to experience flagging morale and there are some practical things they can do to improve the situation.

The Example of Leadership

Leaders lead by example, a positive one. If they behave in stressed-out ways then employees pick up on it. Think about the difference if a leader is calm and balanced instead of panicking.

Knowledge Instead of Drive

Many leaders get caught up in the idea that they have to drive their employees like a team of horses. They push and push and push until the stagecoach goes careening down a gully. Try being there for employees when they ask for help and give them your knowledge only when they ask for it. Trust that they know how to do their jobs and drive them less.

Find Out What Your Employees Love Doing

People feel great when they are using their talents and are actually interested in what they’re doing. Identify what your employees love to do and have them do it.

Praise Constantly

Telling people they’re doing a great job makes them feel great. Praising also helps you focus on successes rather than always correcting perceived mistakes or offering the dreaded constructive criticism.

Offer Opportunities for Bonding

Give people a chance to interact in positive ways. Set up a regularly scheduled meeting time where people can talk with each other and share success stories.

Value Self-Awareness

Leaders who value self-awareness are able to mange their own and others emotions, thoughts, and actions to build a more cohesive, healthy, positive workplace.

Try these six ideas and you’ll find that your employees are feeling better about themselves, each other and you. What will you do develop self-awareness and improve the morale in your company?

Cheers,

Guy