The Self-Awareness Guy

The Path to Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

The Path to Self-Awareness

/ / Self-Awareness, Self-Consciousness / , , , ,

The path to self-awareness reveals itself to you as you’re ready for it. Here are some examples of how you can tell that you’re on your way:

  • You look at yourself without criticism or judgment.
  • You realize that there are things about you that can be improved.
  • You understand that life is a journey rather than a finite goal.
  • You have the courage to examine and continue healing your hurts.
  • You keep growing and learning throughout your life.
  • You see results in your life based on your thoughtful, kind, compassionate thinking and behavior.
  • You actively work on making your dreams a reality.
  • You live life as the real you.

If you do things like these, you know how great it feels to live authentically and share your gifts with yourself and the world; if you don’t, you have a wonderful opportunity to visit many interesting places.

Cheers,

Guy

Increase Your Self-Awareness to Stop Going out with Losers - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Increase Your Self-Awareness to Stop Going out with Losers

/ / Self and Self-Awareness, Self-Awareness / , ,

If you’re always lamenting going out with losers, you might find it helpful to increase your self-awareness. The more you understand how your emotions, thoughts, and actions affect your relationship choices, the more easily you’ll be able to pick people who will treat you well.

We often actively contribute to getting stuck in negative patterns and we label the other person as a loser rather than looking at ourselves.

Ask yourself these questions next time you’re wondering why you are stuck going out with less than marvelous people:

1. What does being with this person say about me?
2. How can I move in a different direction?
3. What can I do to improve myself so I don’t attract these people?
4. What can I learn from this?
5. Do I have a plan for change?

Everyone is capable of attracting good people. There really are no losers at all, just people who are stuck in negative patterns. Good luck finding your positive pattern. What will you do to build your self-awareness and stop going out with people who don’t value you?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Aware Leaders Aren't Afraid of Failure - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware Leaders Aren’t Afraid of Failure

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Self-aware leaders aren’t afraid of failure because they understand that there is much to be learned from any experience or situation, including the negative ones.

I often work with leaders who set a goal and then pile a bunch of other stuff on top of it and paralyze themselves before doing anything. Then they tell me that they’re afraid of doing something wrong or scared of messing up.

The idea that we do things wrong or mess up comes from inside our own minds and was often put there by our families. We repeat these ideas over and over, even when they lead to negative results. The interesting thing is that messing up is such a relative term because it really depends on your definition of it.

The next time you set a goal for yourself try focusing less on the whole “I’m doing something wrong and what if I fail,” outlook and set yourself up for success. Try the following ideas to let go of the need to be perfect:

1. Set an achievable goal you know you can do.

2. Do one thing at a time and don’t burden yourself with extra things.

3. Celebrate when you complete a task, do something to treat yourself well.

You only fail if you set yourself up for failure or listen to the negative messages inside your head. Success comes from setting realistic goals, completing them and moving forward purposefully.

What will you do to increase self-awareness and use failure as a learning tool?

Cheers,

Guy

Use Self-Awareness to Attract Positive People - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Use Self-Awareness to Attract Positive People

/ / Self and Self-Awareness, Self-Awareness, Self-Consciousness / , , ,

Self-awareness helps you attract positive people and build fulfilling relationships because, when you know yourself well and are content with who you are, you’re able to connect with people in a genuine, healthy manner.

People often ask me why they keep dating the wrong people. I usually ask the person to do some self-reflection and the answer they most often come up with is that they are looking for people based on mistaken assumptions.

Most of us look for people that create a spark, that excite us into wanting to get to know them better. This method creates an initial euphoria that blinds us to understanding clearly what we want from relationships. We become so intoxicated with romance that we are unable to make rational decisions.

What I try to help people with is building self-awareness. When we understand who we are and what we love and need we tend to make better choices regarding relationships. If we don’t know ourselves very well or don’t like ourselves we tend to attract people that reinforce that. When we understand ourselves better and are healthier we tend to attract more positive people.

There really is no magic to this process. What’s been shown to work time after time is that people who are healthy attract other healthy people. All it takes is some work first on getting ourselves as healthy mentally and physically as possible. Then we attract people who admire us for the wonderful, healthy people we are.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and attract positive people into your life?

Cheers,

Guy

Developing Self-Awareness to Be an Effective Leader - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Developing Self-Awareness to Be an Effective Leader

/ / Self and Self-Awareness, Self-Awareness in Leadership /

When I consult with organizations to help them develop self-awareness, employees often describe a leadership style that is pervasive in many workplaces: It usually consists of a leader who is a good person, works really hard and means well but is constantly overwhelmed and reacting to events. This creates a leadership dynamic where the leader is in survival mode and really doesn’t have the time or perspective to lead in any other way. Working frantically isn’t the same as actually being productive. Very often, these decent and caring individuals end up being the dreaded bad boss or ineffective leader. It’s not because they’re horrible people, they just lack self-awareness and don’t know any other way of doing things.

When it comes to leadership, I think in terms of increasing self-awareness in order to practice positive behaviors that generate beneficial results. When we do positive things it tends to create more positive results. If we choose to focus on the negative we get different outcomes. To begin evaluating whether you’re an effective leader see if you recognize the following behaviors:

1.  Always checking up on employees.
2.  Constantly asking employees for updates.
3.  Feeling rushed or pressured.
4.  Feeling out of control if things aren’t done a certain way.
5.  Running from one fire to another.
6.  Constantly reacting to events instead of planning beforehand.
7.  Living with constant stress or tension.
8.  Telling employees what to do instead of listening.
9.  Not really happy at work.
10.  Needing to dominate others.

Do you do any of these things? It’s not horrible if you do, it will just create a certain kind of workplace dynamic than if you were to refocus and practice the following self-aware alternatives:

1.  Lets employees do their work independently.
2.  Trusts employees to keep him up to date.
3.  Feels calm and balanced even under pressure.
4.  Lets people do things in ways that make sense to them.
5.  Doesn’t create or add to the fire.
6.  Plans proactively to minimize emergencies.
7.  Relaxes at work.
8.  Listens to employees and values outside input.
9.  Happy at work.
10.  Doesn’t need to dominate others.

When you look at these two lists which one sounds more like you? Effective leaders tend to be more like the second list and enjoy happier work lives and fewer heart attacks. There’s no secret to behaving this way in the workplace. All it takes is letting go of the old way of doing things and replacing it with more productive behaviors. How will you start developing self-awareness and being a more effective leader?

Cheers,

Guy

Smiling and Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Smiling and Self-Awareness

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When you increase your self-awareness, you’re much more likely to smile because you’re more balanced and happy deep inside. Many years ago I encountered a person I hadn’t met before at a workplace of mine who looked directly at me and asked why I was smiling. Her facial expression and tone of voice indicated that she wasn’t joking, she genuinely wanted to squash my smile and do it quickly.

What happens when you encounter someone who doesn’t smile much? What’s the feeling you get from them? Countless people live lives of sadness, desperation, and resignation. They’re stuck in a depressing place and can’t see the positive alternatives available to them. I’ve found over years of working with people that it’s possible to overcome negativity and move in a more joyful direction, but it requires conscious effort and dedication.

It takes a lot of self-awareness and courage to smile, especially in the face of sadness, anger, fear, or uncertainty. The reason I smile in even some of the most difficult situations is because I ask myself, “What’s the alternative?” which is, by the way, what I said to the woman.

Building up your self-awareness is like smiling, it reflects your inner light and makes the world a better place. What will you do to develop self-awareness and smile more?

Cheers,

Guy

How to Date Successfully Using Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

How to Date Successfully Using Self-Awareness

/ / Self and Self-Awareness, Self-Awareness / , ,

Great dating is about possessing self-awareness, which helps you understand who you are and how to be treated well. We often go for exciting people rather than those who will treat us well and will become more exciting over time. Think about the following the next time you are trying to improve your dating experiences:

1. Who am I as a person?
2. What do I want out of dating?
3. Do the people I date build me up as a person and make me feel great about myself?
4. Do I date because I’m healthy and happy or do I date to fulfill some other need?
5. Am I doing things to date people who share my interests and dreams?

Dating doesn’t have to be serious and boring, it can be very exciting when you find people who really share your interests and who treat you well. Always keep in mind that you deserve to date people who make you feel great and let you be who you are.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and date successfully?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy