Self and Self-Awareness Archives – The Self-Awareness Guy

Increase Your Self-Awareness to Stop Going out with Losers

March 21, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy - Leave a Comment

If you’re always lamenting going out with losers, you might find it helpful to increase your self-awareness. The more you understand how your emotions, thoughts, and actions affect your relationship choices, the more easily you’ll be able to pick people who will treat you well.

We often actively contribute to getting stuck in negative patterns and we label the other person as a loser rather than looking at ourselves.

Ask yourself these questions next time you’re wondering why you are stuck going out with less than marvelous people:

1. What does being with this person say about me?
2. How can I move in a different direction?
3. What can I do to improve myself so I don’t attract these people?
4. What can I learn from this?
5. Do I have a plan for change?

Everyone is capable of attracting good people. There really are no losers at all, just people who are stuck in negative patterns. Good luck finding your positive pattern. What will you do to build your self-awareness and stop going out with people who don’t value you?

Cheers,

Guy

Use Self-Awareness to Attract Positive People

March 11, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy - Leave a Comment

Self-awareness helps you attract positive people and build fulfilling relationships because, when you know yourself well and are content with who you are, you’re able to connect with people in a genuine, healthy manner.

People often ask me why they keep dating the wrong people. I usually ask the person to do some self-reflection and the answer they most often come up with is that they are looking for people based on mistaken assumptions.

Most of us look for people that create a spark, that excite us into wanting to get to know them better. This method creates an initial euphoria that blinds us to understanding clearly what we want from relationships. We become so intoxicated with romance that we are unable to make rational decisions.

What I try to help people with is building self-awareness. When we understand who we are and what we love and need we tend to make better choices regarding relationships. If we don’t know ourselves very well or don’t like ourselves we tend to attract people that reinforce that. When we understand ourselves better and are healthier we tend to attract more positive people.

There really is no magic to this process. What’s been shown to work time after time is that people who are healthy attract other healthy people. All it takes is some work first on getting ourselves as healthy mentally and physically as possible. Then we attract people who admire us for the wonderful, healthy people we are.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and attract positive people into your life?

Cheers,

Guy

Developing Self-Awareness to Be an Effective Leader

March 11, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy - Leave a Comment

When I consult with organizations to help them develop self-awareness, employees often describe a leadership style that is pervasive in many workplaces: It usually consists of a leader who is a good person, works really hard and means well but is constantly overwhelmed and reacting to events. This creates a leadership dynamic where the leader is in survival mode and really doesn’t have the time or perspective to lead in any other way. Working frantically isn’t the same as actually being productive. Very often, these decent and caring individuals end up being the dreaded bad boss or ineffective leader. It’s not because they’re horrible people, they just lack self-awareness and don’t know any other way of doing things.

When it comes to leadership, I think in terms of increasing self-awareness in order to practice positive behaviors that generate beneficial results. When we do positive things it tends to create more positive results. If we choose to focus on the negative we get different outcomes. To begin evaluating whether you’re an effective leader see if you recognize the following behaviors:

1. Always checking up on employees.
2. Constantly asking employees for updates.
3. Feeling rushed or pressured.
4. Feeling out of control if things aren’t done a certain way.
5. Running from one fire to another.
6. Constantly reacting to events instead of planning beforehand.
7. Living with constant stress or tension.
8. Telling employees what to do instead of listening.
9. Not really happy at work.
10. Needing to dominate others.

Do you do any of these things? It’s not horrible if you do, it will just create a certain kind of workplace dynamic than if you were to refocus and practice the following self-aware alternatives:

1. Lets employees do their work independently.
2. Trusts employees to keep him up to date.
3. Feels calm and balanced even under pressure.
4. Lets people do things in ways that make sense to them.
5. Doesn’t create or add to the fire.
6. Plans proactively to minimize emergencies.
7. Relaxes at work.
8. Listens to employees and values outside input.
9. Happy at work.
10. Doesn’t need to dominate others.

When you look at these two lists which one sounds more like you? Effective leaders tend to be more like the second list and enjoy happier work lives and fewer heart attacks. There’s no secret to behaving this way in the workplace. All it takes is letting go of the old way of doing things and replacing it with more productive behaviors. How will you start developing self-awareness and being a more effective leader?

Cheers,

Guy

How to Date Successfully Using Self-Awareness

March 1, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Great dating is about possessing self-awareness, which helps you understand who you are and how to be treated well. We often go for exciting people rather than those who will treat us well and will become more exciting over time. Think about the following the next time you are trying to improve your dating experiences:

1. Who am I as a person?
2. What do I want out of dating?
3. Do the people I date build me up as a person and make me feel great about myself?
4. Do I date because I’m healthy and happy or do I date to fulfill some other need?
5. Am I doing things to date people who share my interests and dreams?

Dating doesn’t have to be serious and boring, it can be very exciting when you find people who really share your interests and who treat you well. Always keep in mind that you deserve to date people who make you feel great and let you be who you are.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and date successfully?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Choosing Your Path

February 19, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-awareness allows you to consciously and deliberately choose your path in life because, when you know yourself well deep inside, you’re able to manage your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors in a way that leads to success.

There are no rules as to which path you need to take in life. All you have to do is continue building self-awareness and move in a direction that makes you deeply happy and reflects your true self. That means that you get to choose what you want to do and how you want to do it based on your talents and abilities.

People hold themselves back because they choose paths in life that don’t reflect who they really are. The trick is to be self-aware enough to understand what your strengths and areas for improvement are and then plan a course of action that helps you learn and grow while making your dreams come true.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and choose the path in life that is a natural fit for you?

Cheers,

Guy

What Is Self Awareness and Why Is It Important?

January 20, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy

People often ask me what is self-awareness and why is it important? In a nutshell, self-awareness is the ability to understand who you are and why you feel, think, and behave the way you do. It’s important because it means the difference between living with your eyes closed or open, being unconscious or conscious.

Think of someone you know who never seems to have a clue about what they’re doing or why things are happening in their lives; that’s a person without self-awareness. People who know themselves well are able to live much deeper, more fulfilling and balanced lives as opposed to just stumbling from one accident to another. Here are some of the characteristics of people who possesses a high level of self-awareness:

They heal the hurts from their past.
They know who they are deep inside and what they really want to do in life.
They understand why they feel, think, and act the way they do.
They are able to step outside themselves and empathize with others.
They enjoy more meaningful interpersonal relationships.
They get along with others.
They don’t need to control everything.
They don’t have to win all the time.
They constantly learn and grow.
They understand how their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors affect not only them, but others, as well as society in general.
They care about reality.
They’re comfortable with themselves.
They’re generally happier.
They make the world a better place.

The reason why self-awareness is so important is that it gives you the opportunity to live consciously and actually affect your destiny. People who are self-aware are able to enjoy living at a more meaningful level.

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Helps Increase Clarity in Relationships

January 10, 2025 - The Self-Awareness Guy

Self-awareness helps increase clarity in relationships because, when people understand their own emotions, thoughts, and actions, they are able to resolve issues and empathize with each other.

People in relationships often move in different directions without even knowing it. Even some of the most well-intentioned people who really care for each other experience conflict and challenges because they are not on the same page.

I’m a big supporter of clarity in relationships. Clarity is when everyone involved understands what’s going on in the relationship. It does away with assumptions, secrets, guesses, misunderstandings and frustration because we actually get to figure out what’s going on.

How to gain clarity? Practice self-awareness and use the following steps to help you get to the core of what’s happening in your relationship:

1. Each person talks uninterrupted about how they see the situation?
2. Each person listens carefully without judging, rebutting or giving advice.
3. Each person asks open ended questions to clarify what is going on.
4. The people agree on a way to proceed.

Dialogue is very important to achieving clarity. Make sure to practice listening skills and asking questions. Open-ended questions are questions that don’t lead to a yes or no answer and allow the other person to meaningfully explain where they are coming from.

This is a style of talking about relationship issues that doesn’t require confrontation; it’s just about people listening to each other and sharing their points of view. Try it sometime to gain clarity on what’s going on in your relationship.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and increase the clarity in your relationships?

Cheers,

Guy