Examples of Self-Awareness

Self-Aware Leaders Avoid Quick Fixes - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Aware Leaders Avoid Quick Fixes

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In the course of consulting for organizations to help them build self-aware leaders, the idea of fixing things comes up frequently. Our culture values the quick fix and most of our workplaces are centered on immediately fixing any problem that comes our way. The instant an event transpires in the workplace, we immediately leap into action and look for ways to fix it. While I appreciate that issues need to be resolved, leaders who lack self-awareness sometimes perpetuate workplace problems by forgetting to look a little deeper before they offer a fix.

Sometimes it’s the process of working on the issue that generates better results than a hastily constructed, reactive fix. The next time someone comes to you with a problem, consider the following approach:

  1. Listen carefully, without interrupting or offering advice.
  2. Give yourself permission not to fix anything at the onset.
  3. Let the person talk with you freely and give them the room to do so.
  4. Even if you disagree, try not to react negatively, rebut or become defensive.
  5. Learn to recognize the things that trigger your feelings, including defensiveness or frustration.
  6. Offer to listen to the person again in the future.
  7. Always behave calmly and kindly.

When you listen instead of immediately searching for a fix it changes the whole dynamic of your workplace interactions. You get to learn what your employees and co-workers really think and connect with them on a deeper level. This approach is different because it requires that, instead of talking or jumping in, you demonstrate the self-awareness to encourage people to share what they find meaningful. You also allow the space and time so that people can generate solutions autonomously rather than by being directed.

You don’t have to spend vast quantities of time or endless conversations on this method. All you need to do is sit back and support people so that they are more likely to come up with creative ideas. You’re promoting a workplace environment that genuinely values people and gives them the power to arrive at their own solutions. What will you do to develop self-awareness and avoid the quick fix?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and the Benefits of Deeper Team Building - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and the Benefits of Deeper Team Building

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Leaders who possess self-awareness understand the benefits of deeper team building, which helps leadership and employees connect with each other meaningfully and work together more effectively.

A lot of team building programs help people bond on a casual, superficial level. That’s great for situations where you want people to have a good time for a few hours but I prefer team building that encourages people to connect on a deeper level by building self-awareness and learning how their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors affect them and those around them. Here are seven benefits of deeper team building:

  • Interacting meaningfully, building stronger interpersonal relationships.
  • Increasing mutual respect and understanding, learning about others.
  • Allowing space and time for everyone to express his or her point of view.
  • Dealing well with emotions, building emotionally intelligent employees and leaders.
  • Developing active listening skills.
  • Behaving with kindness, empathy, and compassion.
  • Being able to achieve more in less time.

Imagine your workplace functioning based on these concepts. It probably seems strange because it’s so different from the toxic environments we’re used to, but it makes for a far more enjoyable work experience. Thankfully, you can design any workplace you want, including one where people have self-awareness and genuinely behave as a team.

The way I reach these goals is to consult with groups of people (especially leaders) how to communicate on a deeper level and build relationships based on kind, attentive listening, and empathy. What will you do to develop self-awareness and promote deeper team building in your workplace?

Cheers,

Guy

Most Leaders Lack Self-Awareness and Create Toxic Workplaces - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Most Leaders Lack Self-Awareness and Create Toxic Workplaces

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Most leaders lack self-awareness and create toxic workplaces without even knowing it because it feels normal to them. They go through their days behaving in ways that are detrimental to themselves and their employees because they’ve always done it that way. Workplace habits are hard to interrupt unless leaders consciously decide to do something else. Here are some leadership behaviors that demonstrate a lack of self-awareness and are very common in a toxic workplace:

  • Shouting orders.
  • Not listening to people.
  • Not allowing people to have a voice.
  • Underpaying employees.
  • Not giving people time off to recharge or balance their lives.
  • Behavior correction through punishment.
  • Imposing strict hierarchy.
  • Like it or there’s the door attitude.
  • Getting angry or behaving disrespectfully.
  • Putting employees under constant stress.
  • Sticking people in boxes.
  • Limiting creativity or self-expression.

The standard reaction when I point out these toxic behaviors is one of surprise or confusion because so many of our workplaces function based on these types of actions. The key to building a happy and productive workplace is being able to envision a workplace where self-aware, empathic, positive practices are the norm. For example, a healthy workplace would likely value these behaviors:

  • Asking people to do things in a kind way.
  • Listening.
  • Encouraging people to use their voices.
  • Paying a living wage.
  • Giving people generous time off.
  • Helping people find their own best behaviors.
  • Creating a horizontal organizational structure.
  • Helping people generate their own solutions to difficult issues.
  • Behaving kindly, compassionately and respectfully.
  • Building a workplace that doesn’t stress people out.
  • Allowing people to use their talents and abilities.
  • Welcoming creativity and individuality.

Many leaders who lack self-awareness are highly skeptical of this type of approach and don’t think it’s possible or practical; which becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy because, if you don’t believe you can create a healthy workplace, you won’t. It takes time, energy, self-awareness and commitment to design a work environment where leaders and employees behave positively but it feels great when you achieve it.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and create a healthy workplace?

Cheers,

Guy

Leaders Who Lack Self-Awareness Are Stingy with Praise - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Leaders Who Lack Self-Awareness Are Stingy with Praise

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Leaders who lack self-awareness are stingy with praise because they don’t realize how important it is to help others feel great about themselves and to build people up instead of always correcting or tearing them down.

I consult with many different leaders and organizations and I get a feel for how their workplaces run by observing how they interact in the training we do together. I regularly notice that when the topic of praise (or praising employees) comes up or when we discuss praising people on the job one or more people will raise an objection. It usually goes something like this:

  • You have to be careful about praising too much.
  • It’s counter-productive to praise all the time.
  • It’s phony to praise people a lot.
  • Praise makes people soft.
  • Praise makes people achieve less.
  • How do you praise everyone when only one person deserves praise?
  • Why would I praise bad behavior?
  • I don’t believe you.
  • That doesn’t work.

The remarkable thing about these types of statement or questions is how much they illustrate our lack of self-awareness and related discomfort about praising employees. Perhaps it comes from our families; where we had to prove our worth or rarely (if ever) heard a supportive word. It could arise from never having worked in an organization where praise was part of the culture or leadership praised often. These thought patterns become entrenched in us to the point where we’ll argue about whether praise is positive and behave accordingly.

What I’ve come to realize is that people who lack self-awareness are suspicious of praise primarily because they have not experienced it in action. Praise builds workplaces where employees feel valued. It is also one of the best tools to increase the likelihood that employees will repeat a desired behavior and find other ways to contribute. People like it when someone appreciates the work they’re doing or the ideas they bring to the table.

Leaders who lack self-awareness don’t praise much, if at all, and tend to create workplaces where people are starving for recognition, feel unappreciated and where productivity, procedures and rules take precedence over people. Praise offers a great opportunity to create a workplace that celebrates instead of castigates. Here are some guidelines for praising people:

  • Praise positive behaviors.
  • Be genuine and generous.
  • Praise specific things that people are doing well.
  • Distribute praise evenly, find something positive each person is doing.
  • Make the praise about the other person, keep it brief and focused on them.
  • Keep praising until it becomes the new culture.

The trap many leaders get caught in is thinking that praise is stroking people for bad work when it’s actually about celebrating good work. We’ve been conditioned into thinking that criticism and directives are the only ways to motivate people when a simple, “I appreciate the great job you did,” does much more for building morale and motivation.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and praise people more in your workplace?

Cheers,

Guy

How Self-Aware Leaders Deal with Problems at Work - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

How Self-Aware Leaders Deal with Problems at Work

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Self-aware leaders are able to deal with problems at work because they understand their and others’ emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, which helps them build highly functional workplaces.

We all know people who keep going when things get tough at work but it’s another story to do it ourselves if it happens to us. It’s so much easier to tell someone else how to keep going but not quite as simple when you have to do it yourself. Here are some tips on what you can do to use self-awareness when challenges arise in your work life.

This Too Shall Pass
Even the most difficult situations eventually go away and transform into something else. Change is constantly happening at work and and even terrible times eventually end.

What Can I Learn?
Everything that happens to you is a chance to learn. Think about what you would and how you might prepare differently in the future.

New Opportunities
Any challenge that comes your way is an opportunity to think in new ways and discover alternate approaches.

You Can Handle It and You Don’t Have to Control It
There really isn’t anything you can’t handle unless you convince yourself that you can’t. Remember that there are things that you simply can’t control.

Your Mental Attitude
You don’t have to forget that things are difficult but you can focus your thoughts on what you can do about the situation rather than what you can’t change.

Take Care of Yourself
Do things to comfort yourself, that bring you joy and don’t cost money. Take a walk, hug your significant other, exercise or do any other activity that helps you feel better.

Try these ideas the next time you feel that work is too much. With some practice, you’ll find that you can handle anything that comes your way in your career and workplace. What will you do to develop self-awareness and deal effectively with the problems that come your way?

Cheers,

Guy

Team Building, Self-Awareness, and Healing the Past to Move Forward - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Team Building, Self-Awareness, and Healing the Past to Move Forward

/ / Self-Awareness in Leadership / , , ,

When people in a workplace, starting with leadership, possess self-awareness, they are able to practice effective team building and heal negative situations, memories, and other remnants from the past in order to move forward together successfully.

Many teams hang on to hurts from the past that get in the way of practicing effective team building. Although it’s highly beneficial to heal past hurts, it’s common for leaders and teams that lack self-awareness to pretend that they don’t exist and avoid dealing with them. When you heal the past you get rid of the junk that clogs up your workplace interactions. You get a chance to hit the reset button and move in whatever direction you want with your team.

I am not recommending that your group wallows in agony and despair. Your goal is to develop self-awareness, benefit from acknowledging the past, and then move forward. If you have some issue that affects your team’s functioning today why not do something to move past it? Once you resolve it you’ll be ready to grow without having that issue holding you back in any way. Here’s how you can get started working together on putting the past behind you.

1.  Think of something that happened to the team that still affects everyone to this day.

2.  Acknowledge that it exists.

3.  Write down how it affects each person currently.

4.  How would the group be different if this issue were not in the picture?

5.  What is each member of the team willing to do to move beyond the issue?

Your answers to these ideas will help you start a dialogue and create a starting point so that you can move forward without the the past weighing you down. You’ll also all work together more happily without the stuff that was holding you back.

What will you do to increase self-awareness in your workplace and build strong teams that heal the past?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness, Leadership, and Dealing with Difficult Situations at Work - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness, Leadership, and Dealing with Difficult Situations at Work

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Leaders who possess self-awareness are adept at dealing with difficult situations at work because they are able to deal with their own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, as well as thinking about how others perceive what’s going on.

I often get questions from leaders who are diligently trying to figure out what to do in a difficult situation at work but can’t quite find an answer. Most leaders and managers care for the well-being of their employees but may not have access to resources to resolve challenges. There’s nothing terrible about this kind of situation, all you need to do is add another tool to help you deal with the matter at hand.

I encourage people to think in terms of increasing self-awareness and finding their own solutions to tough issues in the workplace. For example, spend some time thinking and doing the following:

1. What would I name this issue?

2. What are some possible solutions for the issue?

3. Which solution makes the most sense to me?

4. What do I need to do to start working on the solution?

As you answer these questions (in order) you will begin to improve your self-awareness and formulate a strategy to deal with whatever situation comes your way. If you think about it, this four-question process simply defines what you’re dealing with and narrows down your options so that you can focus on a solution.

Try using these four steps and arrive at your own carefully thought-out decisions. Dealing with tough issues doesn’t have to be complicated. Break the situation into manageable pieces and you’ll be able to work on it more effectively. What will you do to develop self-awareness and deal effectively with difficult situations at work?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy