Examples of Self-Awareness

Self-Awareness and Being Insecure - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Being Insecure

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When you enjoy a high level of self-awareness you tend to be less insecure because you understand who you really are and you don’t compare yourself to others. Countless people wander through life measuring themselves against some arbitrary standard set by someone else rather than becoming healthy and happy on their own. The first step in moving past insecurity is to acknowledge it. Here are some signs to look for:

  • You compare yourself to others.
  • You try to be perfect.
  • Deep down inside, you don’t like yourself.
  • You’re not living your own life.
  • You don’t treat yourself or others well.
  • You seldom practice compassion.
  • You’re always trying to beat someone else.
  • You revel in power and control.

When you do these types of things, it doesn’t mean you’re a terrible person but, rather, that you may not have yet really gotten in touch with the person you really are deep inside. Take the time to get to know who you really are and live your life based on your true joys and passions and you won’t have to worry about what others think or compare yourself to anyone but yourself. What will you do to reduce your insecurity?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Means Being Yourself - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Means Being Yourself

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There are a lot of miserable people walking around because they’re doing what their families tell them to do, what their friends want them to do, or what some external being compels them to do rather than focusing on building self-awareness and living authentically.

The true key to happiness is to be yourself and live as the real you. Over many years of consulting for individuals who value developing self-awareness, I’ve noticed that people cause themselves all kinds of unnecessary grief and tension because they don’t live in a way that reflects who they really are inside.

When you’re the authentic you it opens all kinds of doors, you meet people who understand where you’re coming from and what you’re doing. You project positive energy when you’re following your passion. Since I let go of being someone I wasn’t and became a poet, I feel better about myself and connect with people who value what I do. I really like it when people like the real me instead of some artificial persona.

What do you do to be yourself?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Family Functioning - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Family Functioning

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Self-awareness is a major component of healthy family functioning because, the more people understand themselves, the easier it will be for them to get along with each other and interact positively. We’ve been led to believe that families are about order, control, hierarchy, respect, tradition and other words that put people in boxes rather than encourage them to be themselves and live joyfully. People in restrictive families are often asked to do things like:

  • Keep secrets.
  • Sublimate their own identity to fit the group.
  • Follow rules, no matter how unreasonable or arbitrary.
  • Be in constant conflict and call it love.
  • Occasionally do nice things for each other.
  • Have no effective problem-solving or conflict resolution mechanisms.
  • Talk only about approved subjects.
  • Blindly defer to people who may not know what they’re doing.
  • Only express approved emotions.
  • Negative behaviors are tolerated.

These types of actions are common in many families but don’t lead to celebrating individuals and helping them discover who they really are deep inside. When family members possess a high level of self-awareness they likely promote behaviors such as:

  • Talking openly about difficult subjects.
  • Building one’s own identify and being accepted.
  • Worrying less about rules and more about critical thinking.
  • Treating each other with kindness and empathy.
  • Consistently doing nice things for each other.
  • Understanding how to fix problems and resolve conflicts.
  • All conversation topics are valid and important.
  • Everyone is equal.
  • All emotions are welcome.
  • Positive behaviors are the norm.

There is a vast difference between the type of interactions that result from the first list and the second. The higher your level of self-awareness is, the more likely you are to move away from power and control to encouraging everyone to be his or her amazing self without restrictions or conditions. What will you do to improve your family functioning?

Cheers,
Guy

Self-Awareness and Seeing the Big Picture - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Seeing the Big Picture

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A lot of people think that working on their self-awareness is a selfish pursuit but they may be missing the point. When you deeply understand why you think or act the way you do, you move from being someone who lives unconsciously to someone who understands the implications surrounding their thoughts and behaviors. For example: If you get mad at friends or family all the time, you’re behaving in a way that is specific and limited, whereas if you take the time to think about what you’re doing and how you can move in a positive direction, you increase your ability to see things from a wider perspective.

You can choose to live life based only on what you think, feel and do in the moment but you’ll be much happier and fulfilled if you pause and think about all the other options available to you. What will you do to use your self-awareness to see the big picture?

Take care

Guy

Self-Awareness Helps Get Rid of Bigotry - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Helps Get Rid of Bigotry

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Bigotry is about as far away from self-awareness as you can get. It means living a closed, scared, reactive life that doesn’t do anybody any good, including the person being a bigot. I thought I’d write on this difficult subject because I really care about people being able to love themselves and others. There is a lot of hurt in our world and there are countless valuable individuals who are literally living in fear, pain, and rage instead of enjoying their time on this earth. I hope this article will help someone out there feel better about himself or herself and decide to live a life of joy. To start off, here are fifteen ways to tell you’re a bigot:

  1. You can’t stand when someone disagrees with your beliefs or views.
  2. You get angry or violent toward people who aren’t like you.
  3. You live constantly angry at other people.
  4. You have difficulty being vulnerable around other people and are trying to keep them from seeing the real you and hurting you.
  5. You hate people who are different from you.
  6. You prejudge people before you get to know them.
  7. You hate people because of any number of things including how they look, talk, dress, worship (or not), or any other number of reasons.
  8. Only your opinions matter.
  9. You have difficulty accepting everyone.
  10. You feel powerless inside and act super tough to cover for it, or try to take away other people’s power.
  11. You feel threatened by others.
  12. You have seen people give you a scared look when you tell them about your views.
  13. You believe in striking first before they strike at you.
  14. Conflict seems to find you.
  15. You don’t ever really feel happy inside, even if you say you are.

The reason this subject means so much to me is that I’ve personally seen so many wonderful people give their lives away to hate and toxicity. They go from being human beings full of potential to angry creatures who hurt others. The good news about bigotry is that it’s not a lifelong commitment, you can choose to move in a more positive direction at any time by doing things like:

  • Building self-awareness by understanding where your emotions, thoughts, and behaviors come.
  • Healing the hurts from your childhood.
  • Living a life of love and compassion.
  • Getting to know as many different kinds of people as possible and enjoying everything they have to offer.
  • Realizing how great life is when you’re free of fear or hate.
  • Understanding how much you matter and how important it is for you to find what makes you happy deep inside instead of living a life where you’re constantly getting angry at outside things.
  • Having the courage to go see a therapist to help you along the way.
  • Surrounding yourself with people who are soft, kind, compassionate, caring, accepting, and who will value the new you.
  • Taking action to do nice things for others every day.
  • Resolving to help build a better world for everyone.
  • Doing the things you really love in life.
  • Discovering the real you and celebrating yourself.

Look at both these lists and honestly ask yourself which one might feel better. In my experience, its the path of love and kindness that always leads to better results. It will take a lot of work to shift your old emotions, thoughts, and behaviors but the reward is that you’ll get to live a life of self-awareness, peace, and happiness. I wish you all the best on your journey, I know you can do it.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and move past bigotry?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Reducing Family Conflict - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Reducing Family Conflict

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Self-awareness can help reduce family conflict because, when people understand themselves well, they are better able to work things out with others.

Conflict can be especially painful when it involves family. My clients often ask me what to do about a family member who they can’t get along with. It can be tricky to deal with family because there are often rules we are expected to follow in our families.

It’s common to feel a sense of duty toward family but that doesn’t give people a free pass to hurt each other. Ideally we treat everyone with the same dignity and respect whether they are family or not.

Here are a few ideas to help you build self-awareness and set boundaries with your family:

1. Respect your needs and beliefs first.
2. Inform your family about what you want. Set limits and boundaries.
3. Inform your family you are available to work things out.
4. Work with them to resolve the conflict.
5. Set the example for how you want to be treated.
6. Take some time away if things get heated.
7. Expect resistance.

You are your own unique person regardless of what your family says or does. It’s ultimately healthiest to pay attention to the things that bring you joy and happiness than to try to mold yourself into someone else’s vision. Trust yourself and teach your family who you are. Do it with kindness and patience and eventually they will understand who you are.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and reduce conflict in your family?

Cheers,

Guy

12 Obstacles to Building Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

12 Obstacles to Building Self-Awareness

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Many intelligent and accomplished people don’t realize that self-awareness can help them enjoy deeply fulfilling and meaningful lives. They think that self-awareness is some touchy-feely nuisance that doesn’t yield tangible results. Self-awareness is a key part of being happy and living a fulfilling life because, when you understand yourself well, you experience the world as the real you rather than living unconsciously or based on what others expect you to do. Here are twelve obstacles to building self-awareness:

  • Fear of unpleasant emotions.
  • Fear of opening a pandora’s box of memories.
  • It’s easier to live unconsciously.
  • It’s easier to live through other people than to take the risks involved with living a genuine life.
  • It’s easier to give the responsibility for your happiness or success to someone or something else.
  • Self-awareness takes a lot of work.
  • It’s difficult to break habits.
  • People are comfortable doing what they’ve always done, even if it’s not working.
  • Self-awareness isn’t tangible like building something or making money.
  • People don’t see the value in getting to know themselves.
  • People feel uncomfortable focusing on themselves.
  • Fear of trying something new.

Building self-awareness isn’t some abstract concept that only works in books. When you get to know yourself better, you live a happier life because you understand understand why you do the things you do. The ultimate goal of self-awareness is to know yourself so well that you’re comfortable living as the real you.

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy