Lacking Self-Awareness

Self-Awareness Helps You Be Genuinely Happy - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Helps You Be Genuinely Happy

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Are you really happy or just pretending? Over many years of providing self-awareness consulting to individuals and groups, I’ve noticed that the less happy people are, the more vociferously they will claim to be happy. It’s as if they feel they have to put up a brave front so that nobody will know how much they’re really hurting inside.

You can’t be genuinely happy in life if you lack self-awareness and walk around with tons of unresolved or conflicting issues rattling around in your head. I’ve met many a “happy” person who is so quick to anger that it’s frightening. When you’re truly self-aware and content, you feel, think and behave in ways that are consistent with happiness, for example:

  • You treat others well.
  • You’re kind to people without expecting anything in return.
  • You don’t feel like you have to beat anyone.
  • You help others succeed.
  • You think and behave with empathy.
  • The various parts of your psyche aren’t fighting each other.
  • You don’t suppress your emotions.
  • You feel a sense of well-being and balance inside.
  • You smile and laugh genuinely and often.
  • You live life as the real you.

True happiness comes from a deep sense of peace and well-being inside you. It means that you’ve built up your self-awareness, worked on your hurts, and healed yourself to the point where pain doesn’t rule your life or you’re not trying to ignore it.

What will you do to to increase self-awareness and be genuinely happy?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Being Damaged - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Being Damaged

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Self-awareness is a quality that is in short supply in deeply damaged people because they tend to behave unconsciously, based on their inner pain. When someone is hurt at a core level and lashes out based on those inner wounds, it’s a visceral reaction rather than one based on careful deliberation. Here are some characteristics of a deeply damaged person:

  • Thinking, feeling and behaving negatively based on past hurts.
  • Lack of empathy toward others.
  • Rigid thinking and inability to consider other points of view.
  • Inability to heal.
  • Reluctance to change, stuck in current way of doing things.
  • Lashing out at others based on unresolved issues inside himself.
  • Unwilling to examine what causes his inner turmoil.
  • Lack of understanding of what will really make him happy.
  • Seeks approval from people who don’t really value him.
  • Pattern of negative relationships.
  • Harsh, hard, commanding personality on the outside, fragile on the inside.
  • Lies to self and others to justify incongruous, inconsistent thoughts and beliefs.
  • Treats other people poorly, a reflection of his inner feelings about himself.

If you’ve ever met a person like this, you’ve probably gotten a creepy feeling about them, unless you fall into this category, in which case the behavior seems normal. Thankfully, even deeply troubled people can change the course of their lives by replacing their old thoughts and behaviors with more positive ones. It’s a long and arduous process, but anyone with the will to let go of the damage and love themselves is capable of doing it.

The key to being genuinely happy in life is to think and behave positively to make the world a better place for yourself and others. Self-awareness allows you to take a careful, meaningful look at yourself and heal the hurts that keep you from being your true, shiny self. What will you do to move beyond the damage?

Cheers,

Guy

self-awareness consulting

Self-Awareness Leads to Real Happiness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Leads to Real Happiness

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A lot of people claim they’re happy and then think, say, and do things that indicate they’re not. The thing I like so much about self-awareness is that it’s an actual path to happiness, not just some false assertion. Here’s how it works:

  1. You take an ongoing, honest, candid look at yourself, examining your strengths and areas for improvement.
  2. You identify the parts of your life that don’t lead to joy, these are often the remnants of your formative years when you were hurt in some way.
  3. You feel all the emotions related to your past hurts and actively work on healing them. You go to therapy if necessary.
  4. You begin forming a clear picture of your whole self.
  5. What you feel, think, say, and do all follow the same path and don’t conflict with each other.
  6. You identify who you genuinely are deep inside and what you really want to do with your life.
  7. You take action every day to live life as the real you.
  8. Your level of kindness and compassion toward yourself and others keeps growing.
  9. You feel, think, and behave positively toward yourself and others; not just say you do.
  10. You become so happy inside that you make the world a better place for everyone.

If you value self-awareness, you’re likely doing one or several of these things right now and you’re on your way to living a peaceful, loving, balanced, dynamic, fulfilling, healthy life. What does real happiness mean to you?

Cheers,
Guy

Getting Rid of Destructive Pride with Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Getting Rid of Destructive Pride with Self-Awareness

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A lot of people who lack self-awareness believe that pride means being as outwardly tough and invulnerable as possible. They’ll insist they’re proud of doing something or being a certain way even when they’re not. This type of thinking produces people who can never back down, admit being wrong, or change their minds. They present a strong facade but are internally shattered and don’t possess the self-awareness to change direction.

True pride is not how much bravado you project or how strong your shell is, it’s how you actually feel about yourself deep inside and how genuinely self-aware, balanced, and fulfilled you are. People who are willing to take a look at who they are and make the necessary adjustments are much more likely to live happily than those who only focus on projecting invincibility.

Being proud really means being at peace with yourself by living life as the real you, not just pretending you’re doing it. Constructive pride is the ability to feel great about who you are as a person at every level, without any rationalizations or qualifications. What will you do to develop self-awareness and move beyond destructive pride?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Thinking about Others - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Thinking about Others

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Perhaps you’ve met individuals who assure you they possess self-awareness and then trample all over other people. It’s like the boss who says she’s wonderful and caring and shouts at her employees or the husband who says he’s a great guy but does things that deeply hurt his spouse.

When you have a high level of self-awareness you naturally think about others. The more comfortable and knowledgeable you are about what drives your thoughts, feelings and behaviors, the more likely you will be to feel happy and balanced and treat other people in a caring, compassionate way. If you solely care about your money, your power, your own success, your immediate needs, your safety, or your own point of view, you’re less likely to think about other people.

The key to living a genuinely fulfilling, happy life is to realize that you can take care of yourself and others, not just one or the other. As you become healthier and more tuned in to who you are deep inside, you’re much more likely to help others do the same. What will you do to keep building your self-awareness and thinking about others?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Moving Past Hurt - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Moving Past Hurt

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When you possess self-awareness, you’re much more likely to enjoy life rather than feeling miserable. Living in hurt is something that countless numbers of people know all too well. They may not consciously understand what they’re doing, but they experience the results of their subconscious minds compelling them to behave in negative, unproductive, and counterintuitive ways.

The legacy of hurt is powerful. It can travel over generations and influence people in its proximity. Hurt people routinely destroy themselves, others, their nations, and the planet. Throughout many years of helping individuals and groups build self-awareness, I’ve noticed that the most genuinely happy people are those who have dealt directly with their hurts. This means they’ve done the hard work necessary to examine themselves and heal the wounds of the past.

Moving beyond pain or trauma is difficult. It requires a higher level of self-awareness and a commitment to improving oneself. Very few people do it, but those who embark on the journey are rewarded with a richer, multifaceted, healthy, expansive life.

What will you do to increase self-awareness and reduce the hurt in your life?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness, Leadership, and Reducing Stress at Work - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness, Leadership, and Reducing Stress at Work

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Leaders who possess self-awareness are able to reduce stress at work because they understand how their emotions, thoughts, and behaviors can lead to a more calm, positive mindset.

Many leaders run around in a perpetual state of stress but did you know you can do some basic things to interrupt this pattern? Being stressed is a natural reaction if you’re being chased by a lion but can cause all kinds of problems if you are feeling it all the time in your workplace. Think of the following ideas to reduce your stress at work.

  1. Do things you love for a living. This will help you avoid the stress from doing a job you hate.
  2. Surround yourself with supportive people. Make sure that you interact with people who respect you for who you are.
  3. Limit the overwhelm. You don’t have to take on everything at once.  Do one thing well and move on to the next.
  4. Take time to take care of yourself. Take time each day to take a walk or talk with a supportive friend.
  5. Focus on the positive. Don’t worry so much about the stuff you can’t control or that goes wrong. Think about the things that are going well.

Try these ideas to help balance your work life. You’ll be thankful you started thinking this way when you feel more relaxed and less stressed out. What will you do to use your self-awareness to reduce the stress you feel at work?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy