Self-Aware

How to Be Happy? Self-Awareness - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

How to Be Happy? Self-Awareness

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My clients frequently ask me how to be happy. Over the years I’ve noticed that a common characteristic of people who are happy is having a strong awareness of who we are and where we are going. Self-awareness is a deep understanding of who we are. It literally impacts how we treat ourselves and others and what kind of life we live. Let me give you a real world example to illustrate how important it is to get to know yourself.

Person A says he is a happy go lucky person that always is having a great time. He has a lot of friends and says he’s confident and an optimist. He lives a life that looks great to everyone on the outside but, when he has to think about it, Person A is deeply unhappy. He has unresolved issues in his life that are so difficult that he refuses to look at them. So person A appears happy on the outside but inside he is constantly struggling to ignore and cast aside the demons he carries. This type of person is not living a life of self-awareness because he won’t even begin the process of understanding who he is in order to move forward. He chooses instead to live a live of superficial happiness based on appearances.

Person B, on the other hand, also has issues that hurt him deeply and made him unhappy. He also appears happy to the outside world but his happiness comes from a very different place. Person B decided years ago to look at the things that brought him pain. He worked very hard to acknowledge his past and create a plan to move beyond the hurt. When person B is alone he feels genuinely happy because he has actually moved past the challenges in his past. This type of happiness is far more genuine because the person has literally worked through the things that made them unhappy. His happiness is real because it’s based on his deep self-awareness based on facing his hurts.

Genuine happiness comes from deep inside us. It is a level of existence that we achieve only when we work through the challenges from our past. I’m not suggesting that we live in the past but rather that we acknowledge the things that hurt us earlier in life and then develop a plan to move forward. People get caught up in the idea that they have to live in pain if they look at the difficult issues in their life when it really provides an opportunity to go beyond those issues and grow in positive ways. Imagine your life without those nagging things that hold you back. Think about how successful you would be if you didn’t have those voices trying to keep you from succeeding.

Everyone deserves to live a happy life, one where we’re genuinely fulfilled and content. Those who are truly happy have left the burdens of the past behind. Think about it as the difference between living your life with the burden of carrying a giant monkey on your back and never getting rid of it versus letting it go and living a much lighter and energized existence. You will truly enjoy living from a place of authentic happiness free from the worries of the past. It is achievable for everyone but it takes conscious effort and work. Once you do the work the rewards are amazing.

Self-awareness is not about being selfish or self-indulgent, it’s about understanding who you are and constantly working on becoming the best person you can be. You get to be the best you possible and you get to live a life of fulfillment rather than just getting by. Those who choose to be aware of whom they really are enjoy the benefits of living a genuinely happy life.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and be happy?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Regaining Hope - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Regaining Hope

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Self-awareness helps you regain hope because, when you understand why you feel, think, and behave the way you do, you are able to move your life in a positive direction and move past the barriers that used to hold you back.

Many of us reach points in our lives where we feel like nothing is going right. I ask people to continue building self-awareness and focus on the things that are going right. It may sound simplistic but much of how we see the world is based on perspective.

Why is it that one person sees an event as a tragedy while another sees it simply as a bump in the road? Perspective. Why is it that one person crumbles when faced with adversity but others thrive? Perspective.

When you give up hope you give up believing that you can affect the world around you. This is only a perception because, in fact, you can always do something to move your life in a different direction. Try these simple techniques to overcome the challenges in your life.

1. Take an inventory of the things you do well.
2. Pick one of the things you came up with to work on.
3. Take steps to finish the work.
4. Move on to the next thing you want to do.

Regaining hope is often about finding your inner confidence. You reconnect to your inner hope and confidence by actually doing things and experiencing the challenge of completing tasks. Doing things literally impels you to do something besides dwell on your loss of hope. Try these steps and move in a direction that satisfies you. You deserve it.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and live hopefully?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Being an Independent Thinker - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Being an Independent Thinker

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Self-awareness means understanding who you are and why you think the way you do so you can be your own person. Every time I’ve let other people think for me, I’ve felt powerless and have been unhappy with the results. It’s very common in our society to undermine people’s natural gifts and talents by telling them what to do. There’s no shortage of “helpful” advice to guide those who are seeking something or are just used to getting their answers from the outside, but it robs them of their ability to control their own destinies.

The key to living a meaningful, fulfilling life is to listen to yourself and follow your own path rather than one prescribed by someone else. When I discovered that I could think for myself, I began honoring the person I really am and following my own natural course. I now wake up each day and do what I want to do instead of what someone else tells me to.

People who value self-awareness tend to be independent thinkers who listen to their own inner voices. They do their own thing, arrive at their own conclusions, and live more genuinely happy lives.

What will you do to develop self-awareness and be an independent thinker?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness and Being Ready to Take Action - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness and Being Ready to Take Action

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Many people get closer to their dreams by building self-awareness and taking action. When you purposefully decide to move in a certain direction you begin a conscious journey that will take you in directions you may not even have imagined. Here’s what some wise people have to say about the subject:

Anais Nin:

Dreams pass into the reality of action. From the actions stems the dream again; and this interdependence produces the highest form of living.

Anatole France:

To accomplish great things, we must not only act, but also dream; not only plan, but also believe.

Alfred North Whitehead:

We cannot think first and act afterward. From the moment of birth we are immersed in action, and can only fitfully coach it by taking thought.

Self-awareness helps you be ready to take action because, when you understand your own emotions, thoughts, and behaviors, you’re able to clarify what you want to do in life and move forward confidently. What will you do to develop self-awareness and take action?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Means Looking at the Deeper Stuff in Life - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Means Looking at the Deeper Stuff in Life

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Self-awareness is about looking at the deeper stuff in life, the things that most people try to avoid. For as long as I can remember I’ve felt comfortable looking at the most unpleasant recesses of my mind. It hasn’t always been a pleasant, easy, or enjoyable journey, but it has enabled me to understand at a very intimate level how people work through their issues in life.

It’s natural not to want to look at the deeper things in life. It’s unpleasant and, unless you’re willing to stick with it, it doesn’t yield results instantly. The irony is that self-awareness means consciously understanding why you think, feel and do the things you do rather than avoiding confrontation with the unsavory elements of your existence.

To live a genuinely happy, meaningful and fulfilling life, it’s vital to take a candid, thoughtful and ongoing look at yourself and do the work necessary to heal inside and out. Self-awareness isn’t easy but the reward is that you get to enjoy life free from the constraints that used to hold you back.

Cheers,
Guy

Self-Awareness Begins with Self-Reflection - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Begins with Self-Reflection

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True self-awareness begins with self-reflection, the process of examining and understanding what you think, feel and do. A lot of people are able to recognize that they think or do something but are unable to consciously change or modify it. Self-reflection means that you do the following:

  • Be willing to take a candid look at yourself.
  • Recognize your strengths.
  • Identify your areas for improvement.
  • Learn how to experience your full range of emotions.
  • Find ways to identify and heal your deepest hurts.
  • Stop doing things that don’t work.
  • Think, feel and behave consciously and positively.
  • Move from being reactive to proactive.
  • Be willing to learn, grow and change.
  • Be open to new experiences.

There’s a big difference between saying you’re self-aware and actually knowing who you really are. Genuine self-awareness requires constant, ongoing reflection, exploration, and an openness to new perspectives and ideas. What will you do to start your journey of self-reflection?

Cheers,

Guy

Self-Awareness Helps You Deal with Conflict - On Developing Self-Awareness and Being Self-Aware

Self-Awareness Helps You Deal with Conflict

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Many people who lack self-awareness go through life putting out fires and reacting to whatever conflict comes their way rather than trying to prevent it. We often spend much of our time focusing on the issue on the surface but don’t do anything to resolve the underlying situation. Think about the last time you had a fight with someone you loved. What was it about? Did you fix it? Did it go away permanently? Think of the following points next time you are in conflict with someone

  • What is this conflict really about?
  • What am I feeling inside and where does that come from?
  • Do I really care whether the toilet seat is up or is it about something else?
  • What is it about me that compels me to fight about this?
  • What do I need to do to fix this situation?

When you ask yourself questions like these you begin the process of understanding yourself. It is this self-awareness that helps us figure out who we really are at a deeper level. We spend so much time fighting about things that are only the tip of the real problem that lies below. Think about it next time you get upset. Am I really mad about the lid being left off the jar or is it that I feel like no one cares about me?

Once you figure out what’s really going on you can begin doing the important work to actually fix your relationship and life conflicts. What will you do to develop self-awareness and actually deal with conflict?

Cheers,

Guy

The Self-Awareness Guy